Community

Well, I am pleased to report that on the kids-getting-more-comfortable-with-school front, we have progress.   Not that everyone is now delighted to get up at 6:30 and go off to class, but I think we have gone most if not all of the week with no tears and when I asked someone after school how the day was she said, brightly, "good!' and then corrected herself.  Not good, just not bad.  Alright.  Another said that it's "getting better."  I'll take it.  I did speak with the principal at one school and the homeroom teacher, school counselor and vice principal at the other.  Everyone was very caring and responsive and I am glad I made those calls.  Also over the last couple weeks were everyone's Back to School Nights which they call "Parent meetings" here.  It is not simple for me to be out of the house at night but it's all done now until next year :)

Yesterday we moved forward one square on the game board of getting our driver's licenses here by getting to the DMV and getting our forms stamped.  In other mundane progress news, the washing machine was delivered.  It (along with one dishwasher, currently sitting in my dining room) will get installed on Monday, B"H, and while I am very grateful to Shimona for allowing us free access to her laundry room I expect to be very happy to have a machine in my own house.  And here, my laundry room is on the second floor (where laundry is generated) instead of the basement, so that's a small lifestyle upgrade.

Shoshana needed new sandals and we couldn't find anything in Efrat or Kfar Etzion (only local shoe places) so we went into Yerushalayim to the Hadar Mall in Talpiyot and found a fine pair of Hush Puppies on end of the season sale, so that's done too, and it was educational to see what is available pretty close by for shopping.  Apparently, they just opened an "Osher Ad" in that mall, which is reputed to be sort of like Costco, so I look forward to checking that out.

I noticed that the parking lot had painted posters of, what should I call them -- lifestyle PSAs?  I will put some pictures at the bottom so you can see; signs advocating patience and kindness, cooperation, etc.  It felt like a community building move and I wonder who's in charge of putting them there.  Locally, there are also signs on the side of the highway encouraging safe driving that read, "On the road, everyone is equal" and "We make peace on the streets" in both Hebrew and Arabic.

While I was driving home from a birthday party yesterday and we were sitting in a long line of cars waiting our turn through the traffic circle (commonly used here in place of traffic lights), a woman in the van next to me motioned to me to roll down my window.  She said that someone in her car recognized ours and are we going to Neve Daniel?  Yes.  She has a passenger who needs to go there but she is in a hurry, would I mind taking her?  Sure.  So we pulled over at the next bus stop and the girl got into my car and away we went.   I am trying to avoid making Johnny-come-lately anthropological pronouncements, but the world feels smaller to me here, I just can't imagine that happening in Oakland.

On Wednesday night, the Yishuv hosted an opening evening for a community "Time Bank."  The idea is that people volunteer their time and then get the same amount of time in return from someone else in the system.  So someone could teach piano and get a French lesson, or bake challah and get a massage, etc.  Part of the evening was sitting around a table with about 7-10 people and talking about activities you enjoy doing and that you might like to offer.  So it was fun getting to know the people at my table!  The fellow who started it said that part of his motivation was to help build a sense of community because even though he and his father were both born and raised in Jerusalem, he would walk the streets and feel that he didn't know anybody.  Now, because of the Time Bank, he knows hundreds of people and is constantly being greeted on the street.  I signed up -- we'll see what comes of it.   (You can Google "Time Bank."  I just looked and saw that there are two in Oakland, one established and one startup).

Last night was one of the semi-annual blood drives and the mobile unit was donated by folks in New Rochelle, so, Shelley, I took a picture for you :)

My nephew is coming for Shabbat and Judah has run in to get him from Yerushalayim and we are going to be with Shimona and family for dinner again; that has become our routine.  The custom here seems to be that people host for lunches but take Friday nights as family time.  We are having lunch with a lovely family who has a daughter in Tiferet's class; we have been getting lots of invitations for Shabbat and Yom Tov meals and while I look forward to having my kitchen fixed up, I am glad to be enjoying a long break from making Shabbos.   We will be with Judah's Yeshiva for Rosh Hashana (more not cooking for me!) and I am looking forward to meeting his students and colleagues and having Yom Tov in the Old City.

Wishing everyone a sweet Shabbat and Shana Tova!

Thee text reads "Don't be wise with words, but with deeds."

A pasuk from Tehillim, "Don't forsake me when I am old, when my strength is gone, don't leave me."

Never prevent hope from someone; it may be all he has.

Never miss the chance to tell someone you love him/her

Hillel shops for shoko!  Milk now comes in cartons and plastic jugs as well, but it used to come only in one liter bags.  The little bags of chocolate milk are still very popular and Hillel loves them!  The girls take one in their lunches every day and Hillel begs for me to open the fridge so he can help himself.  Then he hands me his bag so I can bite off the end and he takes it from there.  I get his leftovers :)

Mobile blood unit donated by YINR

Our last pomegranate.  We will harvest right before Rosh Hashana and take it with us to Yerushalayim.

Friday

Fridays here are short days.  Everybody is aware that Shabbos is coming, kids get out from school at about noon all year long and many adults (including Judah) don't go to work.  Banks and government offices are closed.  So today, before Shmittah starts in a couple of weeks, Judah plans to harvest the Cabernet in our front yard, and together with grapes from our neighbors down the street, make a very small batch of wine.
Hillel is getting better, no more fever, and the kids went to school pretty happy this morning.  On Fridays they get special lunches in honor of Shabbos coming -- sandwiches with chocolate spread (it's like Nutella, but without the nut), pudding -- stuff like that.  Hodayah has a birthday party this afternoon and I am picking her and a couple of her friends up from school and taking them straight there.  I have not done pickup before and I don't know if it's chaotic with a bunch of buses or if it will be easy to find them.
The contractor and architect came by yesterday morning to look at the work that needs to be done and hopefully that will start next week.  Things always get messier before they get really cleaned up!

Shabbat Shalom,

Naomi

Our grapes 

The neighbors' grapes

Our grapes again

Our front yard.  Nothing to do with grapes or wine, just showing one of the items on my list :)  When it rains, it becomes a mud pit.  Must get all prep work done before Rosh Hashana because Shmitah doesn't allow for plowing and weeding...

Our lone remaining pomegranate (excited children picked the others...)

First Transitions

It's been almost a month since we arrived and this is the very first time I have sat to write about our transition to living in Israel at all, save for quick responses to emails from friends asking how we are doing.  This is not because I have had nothing to say, but that the daily to-do list seems infinite and until the kids started school last week, it was difficult to find a few quiet minutes anywhere!

As the days passed, the thought of writing became more daunting because the sheer number of thoughts I wanted to include grew.  So here I am, the kids have left for school and Hillel is still sleeping (getting over a stomach virus -- Tamar told me they call it "Oleh Choleh" (sick immigrant) because of all the new bugs we're exposed to) and the house is quiet.  Ignoring the dishes in the sink, I will start with current themes and we can catch up on the history bit by bit.

In the interest of protecting the kids' privacy, I will not identify anyone or give much detail.  I will say that some are feeling pretty happy to be here, making friends easily, enjoying various aspects of life in our little community and not complaining about school.  That's the easy part!  Others, despite the friendliness of their peers, really miss Oakland, their friends and OHDS.  There is a lot that's different, and the little things -- like how kids here expect a lot more food sharing among friends and find popping helium balloons fun -- sometimes leave my kids feeling taken aback and overwhelmed.  Mostly, though, I think that the combination of not feeling fluent in the language (wait, the teacher just said something and everybody's laughing but I didn't understand what she just said) and not having old, close friendships leaves some people feeling lonely and homesick.

It's hard, and as a mom I feel bad -- I did this to them, after all.  I do believe that it will get better and that this is the best place for them.  But when someone is tearful or expressing negative thoughts in strong language, it's hard to keep my need to respond kindly and patiently at the front of my mind because I feel guilty for creating this situation in the first place.  My instinct is to talk up the good parts and while I do reinforce the idea that beginnings are hard (which is just a good life mantra anyway) I try to keep the other responses in my own mind because they shouldn't have to deal with my guilt, they are busy dealing with adjusting.  So I tell myself all the things I want to tell them -- it will get better.  It's always hardest at the beginning.  Ride the wave of everything that's hitting you and you will come out on the other side.  It will get better.

It occurred to me that this really is their first big move and in addition to beginnings being hard in a general sense, they have no context in which to place this.  No memories of how past moves worked out, no first-hand knowledge of how new friendships form when you don't have old ones to fall back on, no experience of something foreign and new becoming familiar and comfortable.  The only way is straight through and while I was expecting early transition hardship, this particular dimension of moving is still hard.

I, aside from trying to be supportive to the kids, am doing really fine.  My days are mostly filled with mundane, logistical items to make life in the house normal.  Call the contractor and see if he and the architect can come at the same time (so the kitchen can get fixed up.  Our tenants all said that it's a great house but we'll want to do something about the kitchen...).  Pick bookcase colors for the living room (so the hundred or so cardboard boxes in the living room can be unpacked).  I should really take before and after pictures!  Get the flattened boxes to the cardboard recycling spot near the supermarket at the top of the hill (no curbside pickup here...).  Etc.  Really not that interesting.  I started a Google spreadsheet with a grand to-do list that is shared among the four oldest members of our family and that helps!  So when someone notices that her window doesn't close right -- just add it to the list.

There is a daily Tanach shiur hosted by my next door neighbor and taught by a different member of the community every day.  That is a real treat -- after the kids go off to school and before the day really gets started, a half hour of learning.  Next door!  Love that.  I also started reading Rabbi Aaron's book on Tefillah as part of my ongoing project to make davening a more consistently meaningful experience.

I have been taking pictures of examples of how life in Israel is more tailored to living a Jewish life and wondered why I liked them so much.  I believe there are many great reasons to make Aliyah, but, as much as I enjoy easy access to kosher Gouda, Jewish convenience is just not one of them.  So then I thought -- it's not the cheese, or the ease of finding a mincha minyan or toveling your dishes -- it's the message of welcoming and normalcy that it sends.  You're not an outsider here for needing to find kosher food or tovel your dishes or attend minyan -- you're home.  It reminds me a bit of that part on the picture book "Stellaluna" where Stellaluna finds herself back with bats (instead of birds, in case you aren't familiar with the book) and realizes she's not strange after all.

Anyway -- please feel free to comment or ask questions and I will do my best to address them.

We miss you and think of you often and try to keep up with goings-on in Oakland (Mazal to Karpels, we are SO happy for you!).  We love getting your updates too, so keep them coming!

Best,

Naomi

Shoshana and Hodayah on the first day of school in front of our house before the bus arrived.  No more carpool for daily school.

The sign states that there is a daily Mincha minyan at 4:30 at the Kia Motors garage on the equivalent of Oakland's Auto Row on Broadway.  

I found this leaflet on my car this morning -- it's an ad for Arba'at Haminim -- the four species everyone will need to buy before Sukkot, now only a month away.  

Our local cheese counter.  

The police station in Talpiyot/Jerusalem has the verse about appointing judges and police people from Devarim on the wall of the waiting room.